He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
Randomize