Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
Blood and glitter go together right?
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Randomize
