mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
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