You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize