Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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