i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
