So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
