Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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