Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Randomize
