who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
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