Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
You've changed since you got that strap on
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
Randomize
