this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize