can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
Just high enough for therapy.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Randomize