Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
