Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Randomize
