Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
Randomize
