Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize