You're completely useless in the revolution.
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
