Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Is it penis luge time yet?
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
how drunk are you?
Several
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
Randomize
