Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
We're too hungover to prance.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Randomize
