All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
Randomize
