I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize