think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Did you ever notice that cashews look like fetuses?
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
