It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
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You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
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