ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Randomize
