How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
