I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Randomize
