I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
