New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
