thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Randomize