I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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