Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
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So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
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