There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
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