i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Randomize