He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Randomize
