Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
No stitches, just platelets and will power
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Randomize
