hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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