would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
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