Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
