we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
Randomize
