I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
someone get that fucking seahorse.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
The dick lei will go down in squad history
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
Randomize
