Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
