She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
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