he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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