Three words: puerto rican gang bang
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize
