Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
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