But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Randomize
