found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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