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• (303): View more from Colorado

  So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.

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• (312): View more from Illinois

  Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.

  (773): View more from Illinois

  You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal

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• (443): View more from Maryland

  So called my VP's house on Sunday drunk and told him that if he didn't hire me for the new position I would skull fuck his wife. They asked me to go home today. Thanks again Vodka

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• (847): View more from Illinois

  This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year

  (847): View more from Illinois

  And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month

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• 

  23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (613): View more from Ontario

  So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.

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• (616): View more from Michigan

  whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.

  (231): View more from Michigan

  i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.

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• (406): View more from Montana

  let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now

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• (850): View more from Florida

  I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea

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• (407): View more from Florida

  How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.

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• 

  The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese

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• (647): View more from Ontario

  You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics

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• (678): View more from Georgia

  I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.

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• (928): View more from Arizona

  I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!

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• (206): View more from Washington

  If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.

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• (416): View more from Toronto

  If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?

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