oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Randomize
